The 2 a.m. page
Same problem, round and round?
In your head it never ends. On paper it does.
I am Chris Ellison (BSW, MSW, MBA), and in nearly thirty years as a therapist I have watched capable people lose sleep over problems they had already thought through. At two in the morning, a worry has no edges. Paper gives it some. This takes about five minutes. Keep a pen and paper by the bed, or use the notes app on your phone.
Four lines to write
1. What happened. One or two plain sentences, just the facts.
2. My part in it. What I did or did not do. Be honest and be fair, not harsh.
3. What I can still do. One small step for tomorrow, even a tiny one.
4. What is out of my hands. Write it down so you can set it down.
Now reread it. Most of the time you find you have already thought of everything. For tonight, things are okay enough. Put the page by the bed, turn off the light, and let the morning version of you take the next step.
If it comes back tomorrow night, that is useful information too. It may be telling you the step in line 3 still needs taking.
This comes from the mental fortitude pillar of my book, A Life Well-Lived. Read more about the pillar →
If you ever feel unsafe, or your thoughts turn to harming yourself, contact local support or emergency services. In Canada you can call or text 9-8-8 at any hour.
